{"id":207564,"date":"2021-03-25T18:11:42","date_gmt":"2021-03-25T18:11:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.strengthbasedliving.com\/strengthbasedliving.com\/?p=207564"},"modified":"2021-05-05T16:49:15","modified_gmt":"2021-05-05T16:49:15","slug":"spread-kindness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.strengthbasedliving.com\/strengthbasedliving.com\/putting-strengths-into-action\/spread-kindness\/","title":{"rendered":"Spread Kindness"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u201c\u2026kindness is mandatory – it is the soothing fire we can rest beside.\u201d
\n-Maria Sirois, Psy.D., Author, Inspirational Speaker\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

As I was reading through my emails the other day, Maria Sirois’s video blog series \u201cWhat To Remember<\/a>\u201d\u00a0resonated deeply. The surprising message that kindness is mandatory struck me as a stark truth, a message that needs to be shared.<\/p>\n

You\u2019re probably already familiar with random acts of kindness, where you spontaneously help someone who needs help, pay for a meal for the person behind you in the drive-through line, and the like. Of course, there are limitless things we can do for each other.<\/p>\n

Nonetheless, I wanted to explore other ways of spreading\u00a0kindness. Even when those around us aren\u2019t being kind. Even when we\u2019re suffering. Even when we are the ones who need to receive kindness.<\/p>\n

Make kindness mandatory. It is the soothing fire we can rest beside. The practices below will get you started.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/span>

The Inspiration<\/h4>\n

The character strength\u00a0kindness<\/a>\u00a0is one of my signature strengths. Signature strengths are grounded in that real, authentic\u00a0part of ourselves. These top strengths are so vital that they can become values by which we live our lives. In my life kindness has become one of those values.<\/p>\n

I know this because after reflecting on Maria\u2019s\u00a0video<\/a>, I realized that kindness is\u00a0in short supply in my life. It\u2019s not that others aren\u2019t being kind to me, it\u2019s that I’m\u00a0unwittingly underusing this strength.<\/p>\n

Lately, I have been feeling uncharacteristically irritable. I felt upset about not being able to see my family for Thanksgiving. I became irritated by the tone of voice someone used on a phone call or a mistake someone made that affected me. The list goes on.<\/p>\n

I know not to simply dismiss or ignore these feelings. They are important to acknowledge and process.However, they’ve created\u00a0an internal dissonance that I feel in my body. Tightening in the chest. Racing thoughts. A furrowed brow. This doesn\u2019t feel like the \u201creal\u201d me.<\/p>\n

Kindness is about listening, supporting, helping, encouraging, caring for and doing good deeds for others, and not expecting anything in return. Importantly, we shouldn\u2019t forget to extend kindness to ourselves as well.<\/p>\n

Demonstrating kindness not only feels good, it also cultivates happiness, health, longevity, connection, and positive experiences. In fact, caring for each other is noted as one of the defining characteristics of human evolution. A short, fascinating youtube\u00a0The Evolutionary Roots of Compassion by Dacher Keltner\u00a0<\/a>describes this in more detail.<\/p>\n

In present day circumstances, many of us find ourselves feeling overwhelmed on a regular basis. Kindness practices can help us navigate with strength and resilience. If the sense of overwhelm becomes too pervasive, however, seeking help from a qualified professional might be more helpful.<\/p>\n

You can direct kindness toward others or yourself. Which might you choose to practice today? If you\u2019re feeling irritable or isolated, you might\u00a0start with a practice that creates feelings of compassion and connection with others.<\/p>\n

This\u00a0Feeling Connected<\/a>\u00a0practice on the Greater Good Science Center\u2019s website involves thinking about a time when you felt a strong connection to another person and describing that experience in writing. Beginning here can help you shift your body and mind and make it more likely that you\u2019ll carry out an act of kindness.<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re ready to try something more actionable, take a look at these\u00a0Daily Kindness Practices from Action for Happiness<\/a>\u00a0for the month of December. It\u2019s not too late to get started. Just begin with the current date.<\/p>\n

If you need a dose of kindness, try turning this character strength inward to care for yourself, the way you would care for a loved one.<\/p>\n

I started with the Feeling Connected practice. After completing it, I reflected on how vital my signature strength kindness is to my well-being. I felt more open to turning it inward, toward myself. As a result, I carved out time for a short daily yoga practice when I had convinced myself I didn\u2019t have time to squeeze in another thing. Spreading kindness inward created a positive shift in my body and mind.<\/p>\n

How will you spread kindness? Get started with one of the practices below!<\/p>\n

The Practice<\/h4>\n
    \n
  1. \n

    To open up to kindness and feel more connected to others, try the\u00a0Feeling Connected<\/a>\u00a0activity.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n

  2. \n

    To put small acts of kindness into action daily, use the\u00a0Action for Happiness December 2020 calendar<\/a>. You might decide to print the calendar and give yourself a smiley face or star as you mark off each day completed. If daily feels like too often, pick a schedule that meshes better.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n

  3. \n

    To turn kindness toward yourself, think of one way you can care for yourself right now. Perhaps take a nap, do a short meditation, phone a friend, forgive yourself for making a mistake, or allow yourself to be human.<\/p>\n<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    The Reflection<\/h4>\n

    Amplifying kind thoughts, feelings, and actions in my life allowed for ___________.<\/em><\/p>\n

    Kindness begets kindness. The soothing fire to rest beside is waiting for you. May we all enjoy the warmth of the fire from being kind to one another and ourselves.<\/p>\n

    Kindly,
    \nJane<\/p>\n<\/div>

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